Sky Blue Eyes
by midnightgamin
Summary: "It was a mistake. The 89th letter wasn't the last but nonetheless it's too late."


Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy: Crisis Core. Thank heavens I don't.

"_If then true lovers have ever cross'd,_

_It stands as an edict in destiny:_

_Then let us teach our trial patience,"_

Hermia to Lysander

Act 1; A Midsummer Night's Dream

William Shakespeare

* * *

"Tseung, she sent another one." Shuriken said.

The man looked away from the window for a moment. The whole room was dark except for the light that penetrates to the window. He pursed his lips but otherwise said nothing. She placed a neatly folded paper on the table. Tseung eyed the bouquet Shuriken was holding.

"I bought some flowers from her. This room could use some"

The agent moved next to her superior and pushed the curtains to let the light flood in. Tseung stared at the letter.

"I read it." she said.

"It's for him only." he retorted.

"I didn't mean to…though it's nice to know she still hadn't forgotten about him. How long…was it? Since she last wrote to him?" Shuriken placed the tulips and daisies in a vase and filled it with water. Her tone was almost inaudible.

The silence was painful as if to honour a fallen comrade. She bit her lip and left the vase on the table. She sat on the end of the couch, her auburn hair glistening.

"It stopped coming about a year ago. It must be the eighty-ninth." he picked up the letter and grimaced, "I…It's my fault."

She sighed. "It's not Tseung. We, we were the once who failed him, we were too late…" A tear slid down from her cheek but she quickly wiped it away.

"It's my burden, not yours."

But she wasn't listening. Zack was a friend to her. She almost believed that…

"Probably better to put it by his grave than burn it." Shuriken suddenly said and got up, "Zack would want it…"

* * *

Hey, do you remember the day we met Zack? When you fell from the sky, right through the church roof? That hole you made was never fixed but the flowers loved the sunlight that passes through. I guess you brought the sunlight with you. You might laugh, I know. It's not every day you encounter something like that. And I was no exception. I was expecting a normal day. You know, I don't really know how to start this. I haven't much practice writing lately. Believe me when I say that I think about it constantly. I could start, I guess, on that fateful day we met.

I admit you are good looking. But don't get your head too big, I like it the way it is.

You lay on my precious garden like it was your own bed. If you were someone else I would've probably gotten mad. I didn't really know what to do then. Sometimes drunk men from the Slums stumble inside the church and do some obscene things. But you don't look drunk. And you certainly don't look like anyone I knew from the Slums. So don't get worked up about it. That was a long time ago. Some kind folks would drive them away for me. Since you came there hasn't been an incident like that. I wonder why.

I assumed you were sent for me and feared the worst. I hadn't told you, while you were out cold, you mumbled. Don't feel embarrassed. I think I can understand even though you hadn't mentioned your family to me. I want you to know that my mother died long ago. It was sad but I sense she's happy and so I hope your Mother is fine too. And maybe someday I can meet her. Is that alright with you? I bet it would be nice.

You know I had never seen the sky back then. And how silly I was being scared of going above the Plate. But the moment your eyes open I thought of how beautiful it was, not knowing that I'd rather much look at it than the actual sky.

What was that you called me? You have that funny expression I couldn't forget. You could tell me when you get back alright? That reminds me of the time you asked me out on a date. I honestly didn't trust you then that's why I turned it down and pretended I was clueless. Could you blame me? There's something about you that I couldn't resist, something good and pure. You make me feel different. I knew I had to see you again.

Truthfully, I was lonely and I prayed for a miracle. Luckily, it was granted even for a short while.

Right now I'm holding that pink bow, the one you bought for me. I know you like it when I braid my hair but I couldn't help it. Besides, I just woke up when I had this sudden urge to sit and write to you. I feel the smooth silky pink fabric between my fingers and a pen on the other. It was my most precious keepsake. I wore it all the time. It made me feel pretty and I always adored it and I still do. But the reason I loved it so much is because you gave it to me. Thank you again.

When you said you were a Soldier and I felt a little queasy. I was thinking of not seeing you again but you promised me you'll take me with you to see the sky someday. Then I thought why would a Soldier be so kindhearted? You're different and I like that about you. I was aware you know I was hiding something from you yet you never once asked me. Instead you tolerated me. You never pressed for answers. I would've told you, but I did say I was silly girl. I hesitated trusting you again. Forgive me, Zack.

I tried not to show how inclined I was when you visit me. And appearing so indifferent about it. I often miss the times when we chat for hours and you would tell me stories from your hometown and make me laugh. Our laughter would ring and bounces off the walls. The earth loved it. It seems like everything comes to life. When you held my hand and looked me in the eyes I was happy.

You're such a show off sometimes. I was so worried you'd injure yourself wielding one day with that big sword of yours rather than the monsters. I know you'd flash that cocky grin of yours. How could I stay mad at you?

I'm nineteen now. What was that you wanted to ask me when I turn twenty? That time you called me to meet you outside the Church. You were fidgeting and smiling, refusing to tell me. That was uncouth but I'm still expecting you to pop up out of nowhere.

You don't talk to me much about your job or your problems. You're always so cheerful and energetic. But there was that one time. I guess you'll remember that far better than I do.

I heard your heavy footsteps, the only sound your boots make against the rickety wood flooring. It was your habit to greet me and ask if I needed any help tending my garden. And I would greet back and declined as always. I looked up and smiled. Your face was half hidden in the shadows and I thought for sure you're mad or just tired. You smiled solemnly and nodded. "Do you need help?" you asked. I replied no.

You didn't make any attempt to converse with me. I could see you didn't want to talk either so I restrained myself. I watched you from the corner of my eye. You walked around the Church lost in your own thoughts. Your eyes were distant and blank, stopping shortly to stare at the stained glass or the pillars. Finally you settled down the floor meters away from me. While I was pulling out the weeds you suddenly cried. I rushed to comfort you. You didn't want me to see you cry. I may not know what upset you but you wholeheartedly accepted my sympathy. Your grief was enough to crush me. I admit it was difficult for me to understand what you were going through. Even the earth sympathizes though I don't know why. All I know is you needed a friend and I was there. I was surprised to see when I held your face the bruising scar on your left cheek. You told me it was nothing. I couldn't believe that but I lied.

A person like you could have lots of friends. But why do you choose to go to me? Was I really that important to you? I expect an answer when you get back.

It bothers me whenever you have that bitter smile on your face. You thought I wasn't looking but I was and your gaze would get far off. I wanted to take that away. It doesn't suit you, Zack. I wish I could've done much more. At least make your smile permanent. There are so many things I'd like to do with you, say to you. When I think about them it just disappears.

The flower cart you made was perfect I'm sorry its wheel fell apart though. But hey, I go you right? We can fix it together. I wanted to spend more time with you. When you left I was really sad. I wanted you to stay by my side but Tseung was serious is he? It must be important. I saw your reactions on the playground. It was selfish to ask you to stay so I didn't. I believe you would go even if I did.

I hold onto your promise to take me above. I pushed you out of my thoughts as hard as I could and buried myself in my garden. I placed the best flowers I handpicked for sale and went from place to place in the Slums to sell. You were right Zack, flowers are a luxury in Midgard. A lot has changed while you're not around. Business is slow but people buy if they had the chance. For two years I made it my personal goal to fill Midgard with flowers while you're away. I was left to bring a basket instead. Don't worry, its more convenient.

I wrote to you since I couldn't call you. I gave them to Tseung because I don't know your address. I asked him if there was any news about you. There was none but I was sure he was keeping something from me. It was like you vanished into thin air just as you appeared. I prayed for your safety day and night. The weight of my burden doubled. I thought about you more often as I decided to pull myself together. I imagined what you would do. I dared myself. I would go above as you have faced those monsters. To show you that I can.

But it was what I thought at first. Deep down, I confessed, that I doubted you would ever return. If you had gone back to your hometown and forgot about me. If you found another girl. It hurt me to admit this and a long time to figure out.

The good news is the sky didn't swallow me, which was a relief. It wasn't as how I pictured it would be. It was beautiful, yes. But like the sky I was alone. I watched it dusk until dawn. The clouds form and disperse, moving leisurely here and there. The wind blew hard. Like the earth speaks to me of its illness. And when the sun had gone down the horizon was bathe in the ember of a candle light. The azure was the cascading finale. The first thing that entered my mind when I gaze at it was your blue eyes. How it shone so brightly.

Your friend had graciously gone away with one of the letters I made. I had written that out of resentment. If you did ever receive it please, please burn it. It was out of resentment. I was just beginning to live without thinking much about you. However, I became busy. I said to myself that if you did come back I would be grateful.

I hope you are well, Zack. It's been five years now. I met a lot of interesting people. I'm content but incomplete somehow. I wanted to hear your voice again, greeting me as you walk into the front steps of the Church. To hold your hand because I hadn't had the chance to. To see you smile and laugh. To gaze at the sky with you this time.

My feelings for you are beyond and without you to guide it I don't know if it would ever lead to anything. But I think it's better to let you know I'm no longer waiting. I realize that now. I'm setting you free.

As I listen to the light drizzle outside my window I reminisce the day I met you. The sky lent you to me and whisked you just as fast. I have no regrets. I should let you rest now, Zack. As you are the sky, the clouds are yours and I am with the earth with the flowers to keep me company.

Wherever you are now, Zack, when we meet again I expect you to tell me what you wanted to ask me five and a half years ago. I had a feeling it meant a lot to you. Just don't forget about me, okay?

By the way I met someone yesterday. His name was, odd enough, Cloud. He reminded me so much of you. Isn't that funny?

Aerith,

* * *

AN: I honestly thought Zack Fair's death was a total bust. But whatever, I do blame Cissnei and the others. I mean there in a damn heli?! How could they not save the guy in time?!

-midnightgamin


End file.
